Is Your Heart Securely Locked Away?

I woke up this morning with a song playing in my mind that I haven't heard in many years. Its an oldie but goodie and didn't realize how great a message was in the song until my brain downloaded and played in my head like a romantic love sick girl.  It was the song "Have You Ever Loved Somebody" by Freddie Jackson. 

I would really like for you to have a listen to the words of this song.  Is there someone that is exactly what you've always wanted but your so afraid you have pushed them out.  Lets talk. 

I know it's hard sometimes.  I'm talking about taking a chance with your heart.  Of course you know how to take of your heart just fine.  Its the people that you've allowed to come into your life and unfortunately break it.  I understand that whole heartedly however know this, in the dance of finding true love there is a risk factor involved.  Without taking a risk we will never give ourselves the opportunity to find and uncover the man of our dreams. 

Your probably saying, "you have no idea what I have been through.  He really hurt me.  I'll never let that happen again.  I'm sorry that happened to you but I don't want you to miss out on the good stuff that God will send your way to give you stars and butterflies for your pain in the past.

There is a wrong and a right way to uncover what it is you are looking for.  Caution is required and necessary when welcoming someone into your personal space.  This is how were going to do this:

1.  When you meet somebody find out who he is.  And I mean ask questions!  Your job right now is to peel back the layers and find out who he really is.  I need you to be patient because this may take some time.  Enjoy yourself in the process but don't miss the opportunity to get as much information as you can during your interactions.

2.  Do you like who he is?   So this is simple.  By who he is I mean do you feel good about what he does for a living, his politics, is he a sensitive person and is he sensitive to your feelings.  Is he satisfying your emotional needs?  If you like flowers does he bring them? The key is in the details.  These are building blocks.  And if he's the right guy they will become building blocks to your heart.  But you have to do the work, its the beginning and all the other standards I have been teaching you are still in place.  Stay focused. 

3.  Is he treating you the way you "need" to be treated?  Now notice I didn't say "want" to be treated.  Needs are so important and sometimes we look right pass needs to wants.  Typically when we finally get our needs met we end up having fulfilled our wants as well.  I'm speaking about the Core.  Our needs are the Core of every area in our life.  If that's met especially in love we are in a good place.
Everyone needs to be treated differently.  Some women like to be spoiled, its just the way their wired.  Others may be the simplest women in comparison and don't need that to be stimulated emotionally.  But however which way you are wired is the way that man can speak to your emotions.  It's important you keep a journal and find out what it is you "need".

4.  Keep your eyes open.  That guy that is always there for you no matter what but you keep at an arms length.  Its time to really look at him and see how he fits into your life.  If he disappeared today would you be sad?  Would you miss him?  If that's true its time to make a date and allow him to show you who he is and what he may have in store for your future.  Now if you uncover he's not the one.  That's fine but be clear that he is and will always be in the friend zone. Now you can remove him from blocking and truly be open to the right guy.  Sometimes we create borders so that we WONT have to date.  In this case "My Really Good Male Friend".  Don't fool yourself.  If its nothing cut the strings.

5.   Stop making excuses.  Don't trick yourself into being single forever!  Its time to breakout of your shell.  Dust off your fitness membership and get yo life.  Because nobody else can get it for you.  Trim up! Doll up! and get you some business.  There's a man out there with your name on him.  He's just waiting for you to show up!  If you don't he will walk away with somebody else.  That should be fuel to get you going on your road to dating and mating this year.

So with these important points you are well equipped to let down the bars to your heart.  You now know how to proceed in the right way and what to look for.  Know this, you are human and there's nothing wrong with that.  But now is the time for you to have what you want.  Go get it! 

As always love you and Happy Dating!

Kimberly.