Monday, June 13, 2011

Should you stay friends with someone after a fresh breakup?



In the world of everything that makes sense, absolutely F**!%*! not!  It's just not healthy for either male or female.  Especially if the relationship ended and your still in love with the loser.  I can tell you what you need is distance and lots of it.  This time should be spent reinventing yourself as an individual.  Its too hard to try to be the same when something life changing has happened in both your lives.  If your still having dinner together, speaking to each other daily on the phone, sleeping in each others beds with or without sexual relations.  As long as your behaving as if nothing has changed, you will not be able to get on with your life let alone find somebody else or just to take a deep breath.  Living in denial will only further turn the knife in the wound. 

I have watched people and myself keep going back because its comfortable and then leave yet again because that same person either hurt or annoyed the hell out if you forcing the both of you to say goodbye again.  Its not worth hurting yourself over and over. You'll have to put on the tough skin and be firm and tell yourself NO! 

Trust me your going to be okay.

After some substantial time has gone by, for some it may be okay to engage in friendly conversation.  But lets not fall back into the same comfortable routine because your feeling lonely.  Do whatever you have to do to get yourself elevated to a new and better place. 

It's hard to say goodbye to your old best friend but when or if a relationship ends its time to make a space that's just for and about you. The focus is healing and you cant meet a great person if your all scarred and torn. 

Id like to hear what you do when you have been in this vulnerable place and if you are still trying to get along with it.  Maybe I or someone else may have a word that could help you get up and get on with your wonderful life!

Please let us know how you feel.  We just cant wait!  :)

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